I just completely, 100%, no two ways about it fell back into the habit of being home. I was at home (my parents' home) and just got into the routine of eating absolutely whatever the h-e-double hockey sticks I wanted. Even sneaking food, like I was 13 again.
What was the deal? It started Thursday night...I had a drink, dinner and dessert at a restaurant with Kid. Told myself I'd be better the next day. A friend came over and wanted froyo. I'd be better the next day. Then I just snow balled into a chocolate, carb, peanut butter, diet coke (like 3 a day...seriously!), candy, cheese eating loon. Truly, a looney tune.
My grand finale was literally having a spoonful of peanut butter and chocolate chips for breakfast this morning. Ugh, it is so annoying to repeat the same exact bad habits every time. Every.Time.
The worst part is that I even know it when it is happening. I reach for something and think, "Do I really even want this?" A couple times the answer was yes. A couple times the answer was not really, but I might as well. And the worst was when the answer was, "Oh F it" and try to eat it as quick as possible (entire box of Dots for no reason Sunday night).
So embarrassing.
So the logical thing would be to be rational, realize a lot of people fall of the wagon, have faith in myself that tomorrow will be better. Eh, not gonna work this time.
As of this moment, this exact moment, 9:25 pm July 25th 2011...I, Big Sister, am a vegan. A no snacking, no eating after 8pm, no sweets eating, no peanut butter (or cashew or almond or sunflower!) eating, no soda drinking, mother loving vegan!
I might turn into a raging bitch, but come hell or high water I am going to concer this out of control eating pattern.
See you in the morning...be glad you are not here:)
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